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All that Appears Unreal Appeals

mem_normal OFFLINE
Female
39 years old

United States, California

[ 1697 ]

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MY DETAILS
JOB: Self employed
SMOKE: No
DRINK: No
RELIGION: Other
ORIENTATION: Straight
DATING STATUS: Engaged
BODY TYPE: Average
GENDER: Female
MEMBER SINCE: 06/08/2007
STAR SIGN: Aquarius
LAST LOGIN: 10/16/2007 18:38:49
MY RATING: 0.00

MUSIC
Top Bands: 'Mr. Bungle' (my "clown phobia" desensitization therapy), 'Bad Brains' '1000 Homo DJs','Beethoven'; General types: hardcore punk, reggae, industrial, rock, some metal, twisted opera (Diamanda Galas; Nina Hagan), some of most other things. Soft rock grates on my nerves unfortunately.

BOOKS
All types except cookbooks and "how to" manuals.

MOVIES
Willy Wonka ..., Death Sentence, Peaceful Warrior, Requiem for a Dream, 28 Weeks Later, 28 Days Later, Buffalo 66, Let's Scare Jessica to Death, The Shining, Harold and Maude, Primal Fear, Fight Club, , American History X, Crash, Donnie Darko, Prime Suspect (series), Basketball Diaries ...


MY BLOGS
02/18/2008 15:56:52
01/30/2008 15:46:41
01/25/2008 17:30:19
01/23/2008 17:19:18
01/15/2008 17:13:36
RECENT VISITORS
ABOUT ME
As long as I get enough sleep I am un-evil, people-and-pet friendly and functional. And PS: Yes, I changed my profile to "female", to finally face my paranoia about online identity issues.

TURN ON'S
Quirky, funny, friendly and intelligent people. But mostly those who smell good most of the time. Science, medicine, the paranormal .. and your basic garden variety of strange life experiences. And thunderstorms, thunderstorms and more thunderstorms.

TURN OFF'S
Clowns, clowns, clowns: Had one light its a$$ on fire in front of me at a circus when I was six. Yeah pretty sure he was wearing flame retardant pants, but how does a 6 yr. old know that? Also, as I cried, he laughed.

HOBBIES
Please see "Turn On's"

MY GALLERY
There are no images submitted!

MY TOP FRIENDS
Raphael has 133 friend(s)




VIEWING 51 - 60 OUT OF 126 COMMENTS

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From: _Kat_
03/03/2008 00:16:05

Heres wishing you a wonderful Monday!! Bless you always, take care and be safe!! ~* Kat *~

From: lemberger
03/02/2008 14:04:19
This is an oldie but goody...
 
This is an ACTUAL letter from an Austin woman sent to Proctor and Gamble regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph.

Dear Mr. Thatcher:

I have been a loyal user of your “Always” maxi-pads for over 20 years, and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the Leak-Guard Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts.

But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flex-Wings. Kudos on being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi-pads be aerodynamic. I can' t tell you how safe and secure I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from “the curse”? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my time of the month is starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes to call “an inbred hillbilly with knife skills.” Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers’ monthly visits from “Aunt Flo.” Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants...which brings me to the reason for my letter.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words, “Have a Happy Period.”

Are you fu**ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness — actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well…did it, James?

FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything “happy” about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic message on a maxi-pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually pertinent, like “Put Down the Hammer” or “Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong,” or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one minute miss your brand of condescending bull sh*t. And that's a promise I will keep. Always.

Best,
Wendi Aarons
Austin, TX

From: _Kat_
03/02/2008 13:07:41

Happy Sunday!! How would ya like to have a tank full of THESE babies!! Whoooooo!!!!! 60's flashbacks!! LOL!! Have a good one!! ~* Kat *~

From: _Kat_
03/01/2008 15:26:35

Have a good day!! Stay safe and warm. Friends always, ~* Kat *~

From: slyview
03/01/2008 06:09:40


From: rockman
02/29/2008 23:52:43

Yeah, I know I been slackin'.  What with the two girls at home, the new business, the frequent investigations, the flu, the website, yada yada yada, I know, excuses, excuses.  Sorry.  Hope you are doing well and it is warming up where you are.

 
View my page on Ghostly Gathering

From: _Kat_
02/29/2008 22:27:19

Have a wonderful Saturday!! I hope you find peace and happiness as you go about your day. Many blessings....~* Kat *~

From: paranormalpoison
02/29/2008 12:26:24

Wishing You a Weekend Full of Exciting Diary Entries...

 



From: wildflower
02/28/2008 09:59:51
The Essence of a New Day Author Unknown
This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind...let it be something good.


From: _Kat_
02/27/2008 14:08:44

Wishing you a wonderful day!! Take care....~* Kat *~



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I Am Haunted